Monday, August 5, 2013

Monday Doesn't Have to Suck. Laugh a Little!

Car Humor: Part II

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Monday Doesn't Have to Suck. Laugh a Little! Here is part II of the Car Humor. Hopefully it makes your Monday a little bit better. Have a great week everyone! 


Sometimes we get a little edgy about who touches our cars... 



A little cruel? Maybe to those who don't have cat problems! 


This old guy was driving down the freeway and his phone rang. He answered and heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on 280 Interstate. Please be careful!” 

“Hell,” said Herman, “It’s not just one car. It’s hundreds of them!”


How many people have done this?! 


I wonder how fast it goes from 0-Israel? 


Hate those dang birds! 



Be careful, those Toyota's will get ya! 


I'D GIVE MY FIRST BORN FOR THIS


Push it!



If you have any funny videos, pictures, comments yourself then don't forget to share! 

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Thursday, August 1, 2013

CAR HUMOR

CAR HUMOR

We all need a laugh here and there. So today I built a collection of everything funny that's car related. It's almost the weekend! SO SMILE! 



What NOT to say when being pulled over...
“Hey, I’m glad you’re here. Can you tell me how fast I was going?  My speedometer stops at 130.” 


A man requests a new car, with the specification that “it should be fast.  Like, really fast.  I want to be able to go from 0 to 150 in 2 seconds flat!”
The wife then leaves the room.  Confused, the man stands in silence for a moment, until the wife comes back into the room and throws a bathroom scale onto the floor.
“There!  You want 0 to 150 in 2 seconds?  Stand on this and you’re good.”


Two old and bitter rivals, Jeremy and Richard, happen to get into a car wreck on a deserted road far from town.  They get out, check the damage, then confront each other.  Jeremy speaks up, “You know, old foe, this wreck has made me realize: we’re lucky.  This fighting is so trivial compared to the beauty that is life.  Let’s end it.  Here, have a drink with me.  Take a mighty swig.”  He pulls out a flask and hands it to Richard.
“Filled with emotion, Richard gladly accepts.  He takes a good, healthy pull of the booze and hands it back to Jeremy.  But Jeremy caps the bottle and throws it in the ditch.
“What are you doing?” Richard asks.  “You’re not going to have a drink?”
“Nah, I think I’ll just wait for the cops to go through their breathalyzer tests first.”
Q: What does the new speed limit signs say on our suburban roads? 
A: Max speed - 60 mph. (Fords, do the best you can.) 
If your Bentley is taking up 2 parking spaces, then okay. I get it. But a Toyota Prius? I feel obligated to deflate your tires now. 
A guy walks into a dealership sounding like he's furious and demands to know, "Who's the strongest in here?"

The toughest guy looks at him and says "I am the strongest around here!"

The other guy politely asks "Oh sweet, can you help me push my car to the gas station then?"


"Whoever owns this truck must be one awesome dude. Not only is it a F-350, it's got gigantic testicles hanging off its bumper. Clearly, its owner is a tasteful, understated gentleman who knows he has a sweet ride, but wants to advertise it discretely by letting his nutz hang out for the world to admire. Thank you F-350 owner, for showing us just how much of a man your really are." 
AND IF ALL THAT WASN'T ENOUGH
HERE IS A...

Funny Car Crash Compilation 2013


Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Car Buying Advice from a Dealership

Car Buying Advice from Valley Motors, a Car Dealership!


Yes, we are a dealership trying to help our customers find the right car for them. We HOPE that we will be the ones to help them on their search for the best vehicle (we certainly believe we have the best previously owned vehicles around). Although, we realize that isn't always the case and potential customers will go somewhere else. Here at Valley Motors though, we STILL WANT TO HELP! We made this short video describing the main things on what to look at when searching for a used vehicle. 




If you have ANY questions that Nick here didn't cover, let us know on our facebooktwitterGoogle+ or right here on our blog!

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Are the Elderly the New "Teenage Drivers"?

Car Crash Statistics, Facts & Help


Car Crashes are quite common these days, definitely some are more series than others. Shoot, I was involved in one only a few weekends ago! So now I am "Inspired" to provide some statistics and hopefully provide precautions to all those drivers out there.  

I would hate for you to end up like some of these people... (video)




Teen Driving blah blah blah. Nothing You Haven't Heard Already... Right? 

In the first year of driving for for ONLY 16 year-olds, 1 in 5 will have some kind of accident. 
As parents are screaming at their kids, "Where did you learn how to drive like this!? You drive like a maniac!" About 60% of kids teenagers have learned how to drive from, you guessed it, their parents

Distracted Driving is perhaps, the biggest problems for everyone. 

In 2011, about 3,500 people were killed in a crash that involved a distracted driver. Is that really that much of a surprise with all the new technology? Facebook has reached now more than  a BILLION people, Twitter is now the fastest growing network in the world, and LinkedIn is becoming a business mans best friend. We have no choice but to stay connected, apparently its our new "life-line". 

Elderly Drivers They are the New "Teenagers"

For people over 65, overall fatality rates has risen more than ever. Ages 75-85 are just as likely to be involved in a car wreck as teenage drivers. For 85+ the chances of a wreck skyrocket to 4x higher than those rowdy teenagers. Statistics grow scarier still as the baby boomers grow older, and in the next two decades, an estimated 25% of car wrecks will be in direct relation to the Elderly. What can we do to prevent this while still being fair? Or is it better to be Safe than Fair? 

CRAP! It's To Late. You're Already In A Wreck. What Do I do?

Besides the common knowledge of calling 911 for assistance, there's other things you should do to protect yourself. 
  1. Protect yourself with the technology that usually distracts you. Photograph or Video EVERYTHING (especially when you know you did nothing wrong hehe). It wouldn't hurt to record the thoughts of your side of the story while its still fresh either. This means weather, road conditions, objects capable of causing it, EVERYTHING. 
  2. Get as much info about the other person as you can. Name, address, birth-date, phone number, driver’s license info, insurance info, credit card numbers, SS#.... okay, the last two was an exaggeration but you should really concentrate on getting everything up to that point. 
  3. Be calm, and don't accept blame or direct it. Let the insurance agencies and attorneys work that out. 

Knowledge is Power.... and Safety

The Deadliest times to drive according to safemotorist.com 

During the Day: 3:00pm-6:00pm. Because everyone is tired and in a rush to get home from work?

Deadliest month: August. 

Deadliest Days of the year (2010)

  1. September 18
  2. October 16
  3. October 2
  4. June 26
  5. August 14
  6. September 25
  7. July 31
  8. September 4
  9. October 10
  10. May 22
PLEASE DRIVE SAFE EVERYONE! 

Don't forget to join us on TWITTER & FACEBOOK for future articles, tips & tricks, How To Videos, and more! Thank you! 

Monday, July 22, 2013

EASILY Get Streak Free Windows (quick video!)

Does this sound like you? 
"ALL I WANT TO DO IS CLEAN THE WINDOWS WITHOUT THE @$@# STREAKS!!!"

Those pain in the butt streaks bothering you too? 
Well watch this video and never have those problems again! Thanks for watching!


Apparently people were asking about how they can get "streak free" windows for their cars. So by request (yes we listen) we're showing how we get rid of those pesky streaks! I'm sorry though, most car washes WILL NOT have a completely streak free option. 

HAVE A REQUEST? Let us know on 

twitter.com/VM_PRIDE
&
facebook.com/ValleyMotorsLogan

Friday, July 19, 2013

Top 3 Car Commercials Ever!?

Top 3 Car Commercials Ever!?

Here are, possibly, the 3 best car commercials ever made! What do you think?! Do you have a favorite as well? Please post below! 


#1 


#2


#3


Again, please post your favorite commercials of all time below! 

You can also post links to our 

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Athletes, Weekend Warriors & Adrenaline Junkies Vehicles

Weekend Warriors, Athletes & Adrenaline Junkies Vehicles


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From the Weekend Warriors & Student Athletes to the Vacationers & Mountain men, finding a car that fits them as well as their gear is a common problem. Basketball, Football, Winter Sports, Summer Sports, hiking, camping or finding their sport in their car.... here's a list for your needs. 


Adrenaline Junkies = Chevrolet Corvette 

2013 Chevrolet CorvetteCorvettes have been amazing sports cars for as long as I, or anyone else, can remember. For the past 5 years, regardless of the model, you should be able to get to 0-60 mph around 4 seconds or below. That's fast enough to smack a smile on anybodies face. The great thing is that the Corvette isn't made for only the 5'5" and under club. There's an surprising amount of room available, and this means you can throw your practice shoes, jerseys and equipment beside you without worrying about being cramped. 

PRO: You're grinning 75% of the time due to speed and comfort of the ride, unbelievable.

CON: You're crying 25% because you don't know how to slow down. Resulting in more speeding tickets in the past week than in the last decade. 

Weekend Warrior = Nissan Altima 2007-2012

2010 Nissan Altima 2.5 SL Sedan ShownAs much as you would enjoy a Corvette.... you're a family man. A husband, father, provider, protector & overall, Mr. Incredible for your family. That is until the weekend comes. Then you turn into a beast full of testosterone ready to take on anyone on the basketball court Saturday morning. You need something roomy, manly and practical for your life and the Nissan Altima couldn't be a better fit. Weekday travels aren't a pain with a GIANT amount of space for the driver in this sedan, MPG isn't a bother and its quite stylish for an economy sedan. Give it a test drive, you might be surprised. 

PRO: It's safe, reliable, a little sporty, and does everything you need a sedan to do for your daily life.

CON: It's not a Corvette.

Man Up, Son = Dodge Ram HD MEGACAB

2012 Ram Laramie LimitedYou don't have little man syndrome, and you're definitely not little. You're just a big man tired of fitting into these delicate cars that were meant for people half your size. Introducing the "Man-mobile", a vehicle that John Wayne would endorse and Yao Ming would look normal in. The Ram MEGACAB demands attention and space inside and out. 

PRO: The one place a giant can feel normal. Totally worth picking out hybrids out of your grill every 10 miles. 

CON: You're going to have to find a way how to shove those hybrids into your gas tank to avoid bankruptcy. 

ODDBALL = Nissan Cube

Lets just say you're.... different. Traditional, modern, normal or shy are not words you would say to describe yourself. You're YOU, and you embrace it. Since you don't plan on fitting in anyway you might as well go for something intriguing. It doesn't get much better than that when you're in the box/Nissan Cube. Plenty of head room, leg room, party room or any other "room" you could think of doing with your sense of funky styling. 

PRO: Going against the current isn't to bad with 30 mpg while making a statement at the same time. 

CON: Expect a 30% decrease in your social life.

Mr. Do-It-All = Mitsubishi Outlander 

2010 Mitsubishi Outlander SE SUV
Hiking, mountain biking, snowboarding, kayaking, skiing, white water rafting, bungee jumping, soccer, and surfing... all before lunch. You need a vehicle to keep up with your adventurous lifestyle while still providing extras, add-ons, options and equipment to host all your activities. Oh ya, and you want to look good doing it. Well here is your soul-mate, the Mitsubishi Outlander. Whether you're the new soccer coach and throwing 20 balls in the back or if you're strapping on the mountain bike on top for a weekend adventure, the Outlander is here for you. 

PRO: A faithful companion in life you can share everything with, and it won't break your heart. 

CON: There are none.


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